mm scene 2 part one

[Klaus Hoefs]

Well here is more from my current project:

In scene 2 more about the little seaside town and "mm" is entering the staircase of his rented flat.

(5MB/wmv):

http://www.inf.fh-flensburg.de/hoefs/+m ... eet_2e.wmv

fishpork

Hoefs 18.jpg (18.2 KiB) Viewed 30374 times

another retired captain

Hoefs 19.jpg (52.32 KiB) Viewed 30376 times

waterdrops

Hoefs 21.jpg (3.23 KiB) Viewed 30374 times

[slowtiger]

I like the street scene! I like the overall darkness and the density - something I hope to achieve in my stuff as well.

[Paul Fierlinger]

I'm having a hard time understanding the words in this piece, but that might be just me... it happens to me with a lot of films. I don't know if it's because I get too absorbed with the imagery. I like the bit of Dada you are beginning to introduce. You don't care about jitters and jerkiness and that things behave as if out of your control... this is why working to a soundtrack is so important; it comes together as a mood that works (although I wouldn't be surprised if a couple of years down the road you decided to adhere to motions closer to earth).

The only clip I don't care for is the smudgy transition scene. These "out of focus" attempts never seem to work with line drawings. I suggest you try to create that effect with pen lines. I am sure you have drawn out of focus objects before (instead of just smearing them). The gull isn't flying too well within the street's perspective -- it is as if you had cut and pasted a bird from a different scene.

Animating birds for me isn't as simple as I had at first thought either. This even waving of wings seldom seems to create the right impression in animated films. It's because birds don't wave but beat the air with their wings... their flight doesn't look always that graceful in the first place, when they get close to you; unless they are cruising on the air. But since each beat works out for a bird to be in perfect proportion to the distance it carries them, and because it is a very economically developed motion, and like so many other movements in nature, it all comes out looking as if there's nothing much to it. But when we animate this beating of the air as if there's not much to it, our birds come out looking like rags with no muscles.

[Klaus Hoefs]

These "out of focus" attempts never seem to work with line drawings.

Too bad, but you could be right (also with the seagull...). I feel that there is something wrong with that part, although to be honest I have not so much problems with blurred lines. Sometimes I like my fine lines to be destroyed with blurrings and then sharpen it again with the filters. Maybe I should work it over and experiment a little with less tech for that part.

Thanks Markus, this is my North Sea-feeling when I was child (and maybe you are also familiar with Hooksiel, Carolinensiel, Voslapp and so on...) - all is from memory.

[Sierra Rose]

Well, again, I love the atmosphere. It has a mysterious fluctuation like the key going back and forth.

Anything can happen, or not happen.

I'm already on a pin to find out what does happen. I think that's a good sign if you arrest your audience's interest.

I felt the one fellow leaves the screen too soon just before we see the key. Maybe a few more frames to have him exit stage front and center?

[Peter Wassink]

Animating birds for me isn't as simple as I had at first thought either. This even waving of wings seldom seems to create the right impression in animated films. It's because birds don't wave but beat the air with their wings... their flight doesn't look always that graceful in the first place, when they get close to you; unless they are cruising on the air. But since each beat works out for a bird to be in perfect proportion to the distance it carries them, and because it is a very economically developed motion, and like so many other movements in nature, it all comes out looking as if there's nothing much to it. But when we animate this beating of the air as if there's not much to it, our birds come out looking like rags with no muscles.

well put,

it reminds me a bit of the observation by another old ( ) animator (i believe it was one of those nine from Disney) who talked about how difficult it was to animate someone dancing.
To make animation work convincingly you have to show the weight but a good dancer gives us the illusion of being almost weightless so this makes animating a good dancer particularly difficult.

[Klaus Hoefs]

Thank you all for all your comments and considerations. Very helpful.
I am already refining stuff (trying a new much slower pan, more beating seagull and better believable camera-crash ...).

@Sierra:

Maybe a few more frames to have him exit stage front and center?

I am not sure what you mean here - too fast and hectic motions with mm (the hero with blue jacket) or do you think there should be a longer hold at the end of that part ?

[Sierra Rose]

Right after the VO says "not the exact day or time" and the blue coat main character has his back to us because he is at his door. There's a street character with a black sea cap who faces us and then leaves the scene forward stage center. That guy is the one I mean.

[Klaus Hoefs]

Ah, now I understand. And yes, I think you're right. Thank you, Sierra!

[BenEcosse]

i love how the narrative isn't conventional. Like a moving poem.

[Klaus Hoefs]

Thanks Ben. I like MacLean's graphic oevre (not sure about his paintings). There is a high quality because of its traditionality.

Anyway here is the now updated version:
http://www.khoefs.de/+mm/Untitled-1.htm

[Julian wigley]

....
Anyway here is the now updated version:
http://www.khoefs.de/+mm/Untitled-1.htm

Hi Klaus,
Watched the street to room sequence: I find the dialogue intimate and direct therefore engaging, (more so than in some of your other work in the past)-the personal tone adds to the poetic style you are developing. The imagery retains its spontaneity and the feel of direct drawing is retained through the animated sequences.

Was it intentional to stop the main character's travel up the stairs as the Coelancanth comes to life? It jarred when he stopped and distracted me from the main movement- but then that could be just my eye.

As always, all the best with the work.
Jules

[Sierra Rose]

The gull transition is interesting but disconcerting to me. Confusing and sudden. I like the idea because of the feeling of being startled. But it jars maybe too much?

[Klaus Hoefs]

Thanks Julian for watching my clip. I think it is much more plausible if having the whole film in mind.
In this part I tried to integrate 3D like one can do with a rough unpolished collage - aesthetically it's a kind of dialectic: system A versus system B (or better non-A) sticked together on stage (which functions like a synthesis). It's like saying Yes and No at the same time and this way giving indecisive and unsure feelings to the audience.
I wanted to work the waterdrop sheet as a seperator from next the next upcoming scene (= the hero (mm) in his room. In fact we will him see entering his room, taking place and talking about his past). But I am not so sure with it by now. But it will be easy to cut it out.

The fish, a light horror version of an Coelacanth (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coelacanth) is introduced here for the first time.
Later the townspeople and unsuccesful fishing men will catch one but as it is with this sort of prehistoric fish - in the moment they get him out the water he crumbles into dust.

Sierra, the seagull crashes in the camera-man - coming from the back. Maybe I didn't work it out hard enough or maybe the audio is too low. (?)